So listen

I do actually play a few modern games from time to time. Even if they're meant to look like...older games.

I got in to Skald: Against the Black Priory (Which I will be referring to as "Skald" from now on...) because I had played another game from the developer: Kingdom New Lands and Kingdom Classic. Those games I enjoyed! I saw that they had a sale, I saw Skald.

It looked right up my alley! I bought it, I downloaded it, I played it and I gotta say.

It's pretty good.

Now, before I got any further: spoilers are abound. I will keep them light until the end, where I talk about the ending. But if you plan on playing this or find yourself interested. GO! Buy it! Play it! (On GoG.com, preferably)

The ending is where I'm going to put most of my focus because it's...look, it has the most to talk about. But the rest of the game I can squeeze in to a bit.

There's not going to be a lot of images and this review is going to be...a mess. I decided to write this as a "train of thought" and really only structure it around the acts of the game so...hang on; this review is over 900 words and...well take breaks.

The Graphics

To start, the game has a very distinct aesthetic. It claims on it's sales page that it's "hand-drawn tiles and images using a palette inspired by the legendary Commodore 64 computer" And that's...true, sure, absolutely. "Inspired" is the word doing all of the work here. Now don't get me wrong, the game looks good. But it's definitely not a C64 game...Take a look at, say, a VERY good looking for the time game vs Skald...

A Screenshot of the game courtesy of the store page.

"Defender of the Crown" a game released in 1987 for the Commodore 64 (among MANY others platforms that look better...kinda)

So it...definitely makes use of the increased color pallet, memory, hardware acceleration, etc etc etc. But it's authentic and definitely makes use of modern sensibilities where it's important. But beyond that...Yeah, C64 this isn't. Again: the game looks good. I don't want to detract from that. But playing this, then swapping over to some of the best graphics the C64 can muster and...yeah. It's very much a 'Modern Pixel Art' game that's more like an homage to the era.

It's not all great though. The game is dark which as I'll talk about below, is good! But it's also a bit...muddy. Things are kind of hard to discern and details get lost rather easily. One thing to note: the characters in game actually reflect the armor their wearing which normally, I would say is really cool! however here... so each unique companion has a unique character sprite. the problem is, by the mid~ish game. Everyone is kind of wearing the same armor so telling who's who by what they're wearing becomes impossible. Hovering your mouse over a character provides no feedback. You have to click on the character to see who it is by the portrait highlight changing. In combat, that really sucks. Because you have an "Turn counter" on the left side of the screen telling you who's next, but no way to actually highlight where tf they are.

Once you get 5 or 6 characters on the field and a bunch of guys running at you in melee. It becomes a clusterfuck of madness. Maybe that's the point? but it was frustrating enough to just stop wearing helmets. I took a penalty to stats just so I knew who was who and that kinda sucks. I wish I had the option to toggle helmets or just highlight the damn character.

But I digress. The game looks good, if not a bit cluttered and muddy.

Before we get in to the meat and potatoes, the story and combat, I want to talk about the-

Aesthetic

Holy SHIT does this game feel BAD.

But like, in a good way.

The entire game is just...depressing. The central theme is eldritch/cosmic horror and it pulls it off spectacularly. What makes horror...horror? To me, it's a few things; the fear of the unknown; the inability to find a safe place; a constant threat that could be around any corner. Those things are scary, for sure. But putting them together to create an atmosphere that's just downright oppressive is hard to do.

But Skald? Does it wonderfully. The entire game is cloaked in an eerie darkness. Nobody is happy, everything is depressing...the entire world feels like it barreling down on your shoulders, there's no escape, no respite. Every event after another is just tragedy built on tragedy and there's no escaping it. It VERY gloomy and oh man I could eat it with a spoon with granola.

Cosmic/Eldritch horror is something hard to pull off because you need that feeling of helplessness. Of complete and utter hopelessness and that giving up is the only way to escape. Skald doesn't let up, it just keeps the pressure on.

One thing that games tend to lean on is gore. Gore isn't scary. It's kinda gross but not scary. Showing a bunch of sprites torn apart, blood and guts everywhere is gross but...not scary.

But Skald has a ton of gore but it's creepy because it doesn't use gore as a means to scare you, it's a means of showing you what the creatures you can't see are capable of doing. It shows people literally smashed through the gate of a town like a sausage grinder. It describes in great detail how they were trying to escape, but were caught between the grinder and the lever. Seeing the gates of Horryn for the first time, the people hanging through the open gaps in the metal grate was impactful. Not because it was gory. But because it carried a message.

But for all of the fans of Eldritch horror, this is a good one.

Moving from my favorite part of Skald to my...2nd least favorite, we have most of the game -

The Combat

The combat in Skald is bad.

I'm laying it out. It's there, on the coffee table. Yes, I know it was there, It's a statement.

I'm not saying that to be mean or to be evocative. The combat is genuinely bad. To the point where I was dreading it most times and actively attempted to skip ever encounter I could.

What does combat look like? Well. It's a grid, turn based system where each combatant has an "Initiative". On the creature initiative, they take their actions. They can move, change weapons, ammo, whatever. And attack. Once you attack, your turn ends, regardless of what you've done.

When combat starts, you arrange your characters on the battlefield. You can freely place them wherever the game says you can.

and that's about it. It's not complicated. Nor is it very deep. But I don't think it was meant to be very deep. Combat feels like...something they added because they had to, not because they wanted to. No real thought went in to how combat works.

The primary issue is that the god damn "Disengage" feature.

Basically, if you're in melee with an enemy. And the VAST MAJORITY of enemies are melee, you cannot freely move. You MUST spend your whole turn to "Disengage" which lets you step away one square...which then the enemy will just...step right next to you to attack you anyway, making the whole thing pointless. Unless you happen to have another character in arms reach of that enemy. But here's the deal: you can't move on the bias, there's no diagonal...anything ,really. No movement, no attacks. It's all cardinal direction only.

(As a note, yes some classes can disengage for free, but not the vast majority of classes.)

Here's the rub: You have an enemy. On the right side of that enemy, you have one of your guys. On the south side of that enemy, you have a guy. You want to set up a flank. What does flanking do? I don't really know. It let's the Rogue/Thief characters Backstab for massive damage but beyond that, I think it decreases dodge. i didn't check nor was it made obvious...or it was and I just missed it because I'm dumb. Anyway, to set up that flank. One of your characters has to spend their entire turn moving away, then their next turn, they can step and attack the enemy. It feels bad.

So here's the strategy. You get two to three guys with lots of armor. You space them about a square apart. The enemies run up to you. One WILL Run in between your characters, giving you a flank on them. You then backstab the guy being flanked, back up and repeat.

I hate it.

Melee is the primary combat method for two reasons.

The first, Bows are actually VERY Good. They do great damage. The Ranger gets some great abilities to attack a bunch of times and can do a lot of single target damage...

However...

There aren't enough fukkin arrows. I RAN OUT of arrows and you can't just "make more". I played a Ranger and thought "Okay yeah cool I'm gonna use my bow and Roland is going to be my frontline and Kat will be his flank buddy" but no. I ran out.

There are two primary ways of getting arrows: buying them from vendors or using the "Fletch" option when resting. You can make one, maybe two arrows when fletching. So, you spend a few days just resting, burning up food to make enough arrows to last a single combat encounter.

Vendors don't restock often. I actually couldn't figure out the timing. Maybe it's because I suck. But I couldn't figure it out. But even if I did, you have limited funds that you need to use to buy the rest of your equipment. The simple matter is this: you CANNOT use arrows in every encounter. Pick up a sword and swing, idiot. It sucks. Also, you learn this well after you make your character. Or you recruit Iben. Either way, there's no way to respec, so save those arrows and play a worse Fighter.

The second: Magic!

Magic isn't that great. or, well, it has the same problem as Bows. some of the magic spells are VERY good...most of them..are not.

Offense Magic only has THREE trees. Earth, Fire and Air. There are maybe 30 or so spells in total. And all of the buffing spells are basically trash, so they're out. Leaving...maybe 10? 15? at the most? Let me save you some time, Air is the only one that matters. For one reason: Thunderclap. It deals decent damage to ALL targets. Stuns them and doesn't use up that much Mana or "Attunement" as the game calls it.

Spells can either be Touch, A line, ALL enemies or a sphere. Lines can only go in the four cardinal directions, so you can't use them on the bias. And your spells also affect your allies. So the only time you can really use those sphere spells effectively is on the FIRST round...if you go before the majority of enemies...and they aren't too spread out...So why not just use Thunderclap that targets ALL the enemies and doesn't affect your allies? Damage and effect per mana point...it makes sense.

The line spells are just worthless. Occasionally you can line up creatures to make it worth your while. But since the vast majority of enemies run at your allies, whom are now in the path of your target because your squishy caster is behind your allies...yeah, they see VERY occasional use.

The ranger gets Nature and "Body" spells which are like, holy magic. And those spells are okay. I didn't find most of them useful because...why would I waste a whole turn casting Barkskin or Armor of thorns when I can just...shoot a guy in the face, removing a source of damage?

The exception: The Healing spells are mandatory. Specifically, Lay on Hands and Cure Disease. the Lay on Hands spells are great to have on your Rangers. Their entire purpose outside of combat is to heal with Mana they don't use in combat. Usually stretching your health potions quite a bit. Cure Disease, because Diseases are PERMANENT and DO NOT GO AWAY. EVER. Even after resting. You are diseased, for life. So you either need to pay for expensive remove disease potions (if you can find them, they're not common) or learn the spell. If you don't learn the "Cure Disease" spell, you're stuck with spooky vaginosis the rest of the game, and that sucks. Because it's a PERMANANT DEBUFF...so yeah...get cure disease.

Also, Mana...or attunement as the game calls it, I'm going to call it Mana. But Mana is a limited resource. You only recover Mana when you rest and potions are EXPENSIVE and, just like with arrows, are a finite resource. Once you're out...you're out. I will say, the fact that you recover ALL of your attunement on a rest is better than arrows. But you can only rest in certain spaces on certain maps so...you might have to back track a bit.

As an aside. You can BREW potions but I NEVER found the recipe for ANY potions except a Potion of Bless which is just...worthless. Yuck.

All of this is to say: combat in Skald becomes gridlock. All of the creatures run in to melee, locking down your tanks and your backline just spams them with attacks until they all die. The loot on most creatures isn't great, so combat becomes "Expensive" and something you'd rather avoid. I mean, between the combat being a slog when you have 4 or so characters and become downright frustrating when you finally have a full party...yeah. Combat would start and I would go on Auto Pilot for the most part.

Anyway. Bows and Magic are good, but too limited. Melee is boring, but free so...Melee it is...

But combat isn't why you're here...no, you're here for...

The Story

NOTE: There's going to be LOTS of spoilers ahead...I will try to keep them as light as possible. But I very much DO recommend you skip to the conclusion and decide to play it first before reading these bits...okay?

Go.

The Prologue

The main story beat that carries you to the end 20% of the game is that you, a guy, are called upon to find your Childhood friend who goes by Embla.

Embla ran off. Her father doesn't know why, but she went to the continent of Idra which is a den of smuggling and cool people. Her father is the...chief, head guy of your...people? The backstory is that your father lead your people but he was a drunk and I guess didn't do a great job, so he (and his family, ie you) were exiled. You became a sellsword and now you're here. Neat!

The dad (not your dad, he's dead) pays you to get a ship and sends another mercenary group along with you. The leader of the group: Roland, is an old grizzled salt. None of that is important right now. The next thing you know, you're on a ship heading to Idra. However, the ship's captain refuses to approach. Mostly because of the eldritch horror in the water. There's a back and forth between Roland's mercenaries and the ship's crew that goes like this;

"Sail us to the Island" "No we're gonna die" "Sail us to the island" "No we're gonna die"

then you interlude

"Sail us to the island, or you're gonna die"

"oh okay"

and then they all die.

Ash Ketchem's Tentacruel rips your ship apart, you're washed ashore and the game begins. You quickly meet up with your first companion, Kat. a Rogue...person who I think owes a debt to some merchant guild. But that's about 80% of her character. You don't talk to her much.

As you make your way around the island. You talk to some people and learn the the island is in a rough spot. "Something" has been turning beasts and men wild. The primary problem is that a bunch of sailors and fishermen have gone wild and become "Reavers". Just...crazy dudes who start killing people. Killing...and taking. For what reason? Nobody knows.

So between the beasts and men going mad. You've also got some eldritch creatures from the deep coming and eating people and it's just...not a great place to be. But you have a job to do: find Embla.

You're told that the city Horryn should have the answers you seek. It's the largest city on Idra, I think the only city, But Horryn has been overrun by Reavers, who have slaughtered most everyone in the city, before sealing it off. Which...sucks!

I will say, the first few hours of the game set the tone very well. I am really just skipping along but I am not doing it justice. The optional lore that you can easily miss adds a lot to the atmosphere.

So, after learning about the fate of Horryn, it's time for -

Act 1 - Assault on Horryn

You go to a Refugee camp which is where you meet up with Driina. A cleric...person. She's duty or honor bound to the people of Horryn or something. You, of course, offer to help in securing the town. The refugee camp has a few side quests which are okay. You have to find a kid's frog toy which was just in a nearby crate. There's also a strange disease going through the people and of course: there's no food.

The food: you can find some goats that were hidden away by the farm's owner. (The farm being the refugee camp.) Which I...never found. I tried, for real, but had no idea where those damn goats were. I gave up before finding out later that a cave has food! Some smugglers just...happen to have a few hundred pounds of food just...sitting around, and are willing to sell it - for 500 gold. I did not have 500 gold, so I sold a bunch of stuff, did some grinding and bob's yer uncle, I solved the food crisis.

The cook, who ran the Inn, gives you some information, and says Embla stayed at his Inn on the 2nd floor. He says to investigate her room for clues, but she's been gone a few days before the attack happened. I make a mental note of that, and move on.

The Disease was probably my favorite quest even though it's also...unfinished.

So, a strange disease the camp's doctor can't cure is killing people. You're tasked to talk with some lady who...I guess has a sick kid. The lady says "Oh yeah go talk to the Witch, Katak out in the woods!" So you go to the woods, Find some guy who's dad is being eaten by spiders, free him from those spiders, forget what you were here for, but then remember and find Katak's hut.

She sends you to go get eggs of some nearby lizards because babies are "Full of love needed for healing" or something. Creepy! Evil! I love it. Before you go, Katak has a cradle which something moving around in it. Of course it's not a baby, what are you, stupid? It's a demon thing, of course. You have the option to ask about it but I didn't ask because I know what it is and I just don't want to pry. You come back, she makes your potion and reveals her "baby" to be a tentacle monster that's been eating her. Of course it is. She's a Capri Sun pouch that's well past it's suckin' lifetime and sicks the baby on you. Which you of course punt it out the nearest window.

You take the medicine back. You have the option to give the medicine to the young woman's son first which doesn't change...anything at all. There's a note or thought about "Oh this might leave less medicine for everyone else but..." which isn't the case. Everyone is fine. Not giving the medicine to the woman just makes you a dick and let's her kid die for literally no reason. I...did not understand the point of this "Choice". There's no real benefit to...not saving the kid so...just save the kid.

Anyway. While you walk around Idra in the woods nearby the witches hut. You actually get prompts telling you that Katak's child is "Stalking you" and is following you. Which I found REALLY COOL so I ran around in circles for a bit in an attempt to trigger combat or some sort of intereaction with the creation aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand yeah the dev's never finished this. After my research (roughly 20 minutes on Kagi) I learned that yeah. The Dev's left this bit unfinished. The last prompt you get is "The creature is stalking you" and that's it. You never see it again. MAJOR disappointment and a real bummer...but hey you can pay FIVE DOLLARS for some wallpapers and stuff that doesn't matter...which again, I will get in to later...

So now that the Refugee camp is sorted, You get your next companion, Iben, who's a ranger.

The back door the Horryn was opened. By whom? For what Purpose? ehhhh probably not important. Let's go get 'em! which you do. Which leads to...

Act 2 - Liberating Horryn

The act of Liberating Horryn was okay. So the story goes that the Reavers started squabbling and fractured in to three factions; an old guy, an old lady and a fat dude.

When you first get to the town. There's a little side quest where a guy is outside the city, he's covered in his own shit and hasn't eaten in days. In game, the city has been sealed for weeks. But he says that he and his wife were hiding, they tried to flee and his wife was captured MOMENTS ago so you run in to the city and you have to solve a dialog puzzle to save her. A group of reavers is taking a batch of people to see "The Father". One of those people is the guy's wife. You go through the dialog and say "Yo like, leave the lady I care about but like, take the rest idc" and he does. Drinaa, who's meant to be the "lawful good" foil says that this is a good thing but...kind of a dick move. You don't actually have the option to engage in combat with this group of Reavers which...I didn't like.

Let me fight them, sure I might lose, but I can abuse the alley way and just pick them off two by two after all...

Anyway, you go through the sewers to move around the city. Why? Well the Factions have barricaded the city in key choke points to...do something...I actually do not know why they've done this. The sewers weren't very fun. If you help a guy who calls himself a "Sewerjack" he gives you a map which is kind of pointless because the sewers aren't big enough to really need a map, honestly.

Anyway, you're in the sewers. Why? Iben thinks that the underground smuggler city is going to be helpful. You kill some lizards and rats and stuff. You find the very obvious arrows on the walls that lead you to another dialog puzzle. You can find a few clues that make the puzzle trivial, it just gives you the answers. But what I hate is that each time you want to enter or leave the smugglers den, you have to do the puzzle. It's kind of annoying. The guards at the smugglers den tell you how to leave and get back to the sewers, so just stop making me do the damn puzzle over and over. You can't get lost, you can't get hurt, you can't lose. It's just a waste of my damn time.

Anyway, the queen of the sewers who looks like Dora Milaje is keeping some guy named Iago prisoner. Why? I think she and Iago were boofin' buddies. But then Iago boofed one of Dora's...boofin' boys, or something, so she locked him up, or something. I don't really remember. Not important: She says we can have him (what?) if we go get some documents from a Government...record...store. Why? Well apparently the records show illicit activities. The town is literally drowning in a sea of blood, but yeah, gotta make sure that paperwork is...missing or something.

whatever, the point of ALL of this is to get rid of the three faction leaders; Old dude, old lady and fat guy.

There's two ways to go about it. You can go through a series of quests to basically cause them to come together and kill each other OR you can just...stab 'em and be done with it. Here's a problem: the "Puppeteer" route (named after the achievement I didn't get) bugged out.

The fat guy tells you that you gotta go get the evil, ancient eldritch stone tablets from the old guy. To do that, you have to go through the sewers, find the secret door, go down the stairs and collect them where the old dude hid them.

However; I went UP the ladder to where the old guy was which triggered combat with the lone guy that was up there. See the ladder goes up to a little side room. So I fought that one guy, but the rest of the compound...building place wasn't alerted...yet. This made ALL of the reavers and each faction hostile. So that route was locked out. I still collected the tablets, which were now pointless (you can sell them for money to a guy...I did not do this). But because I took the wrong ladder, I couldn't do the rest of the quests.

However to note; the old lady...didn't become hostile. I just couldn't do anything with her. I could speak to her. But the only option was to engage in combat. The game actually took away my ability to say "cya later". So if you talk to her, you HAVE to fight her. I did, because the game let me place all of my characters on an upper landing which funneled the 8+ powerful enemies in to a tube. By the way; creatures cannot pass through each others spaces, allies or otherwise. So my armored guys just...stood there, dealing minimal damage. While the enemy literally got stuck on the stairs from all of them trying to run up at once. My archers fired arrows down, killing them easily.

Also this is where you get the books that Dora wants...just go down the wall and there's a lone federal guard just...hanging out. He's too afraid to leave because of the, you know, demons. But not too scared to tell the fully kitted out adventurers covered in gore to fuck off, these are MY Government documents. You tell him "don't worry; the coast is clear" he runs out and you never see him again. I like to think he was killed shortly after by a reaver. But I collect the ledgers.

Anyway. I killed the other Reaver faction leaders. It wasn't hard because I just put my armored guys in the natural choke points and fought them onsie twosies....this had become and will remain the primary strategy for combat...

At this point, the residents come back to the town. Even though the city isn't secured yet. There's a fort where "The Father" is. You have to go through the catacombs to get to it.

As an aside. the Inn, once you unlock it, becomes a shortcut so you don't have to go through the sewers. I try to go upstairs but you CAN'T. The stairs aren't an option. Even after everyone comes back and the city is secured, you CAN'T go upstairs. The game explicitly tells me about the Inn. The Inn is a prominent and mandatory place to go and it won't let me do the thing that it told me to do. It's probably minor, but this is bogus. Why tell me about the room on the 2nd floor if I can't GO there? just...Don't say anything! Jeezums.

Anyway. The fort bit sucks, honestly. You go through the catacombs. This is where you start fighting more fungal creatures. You get to the fort, see "The Father" is a fish guy. the fish guy is looking for Embla. he kills each person the Reavers have lined up for him until he gets to Embla who throws some pocket sand, but she gets sleepy and takes a nap. You then fight the fish guy and some cultists.

After killing the fish guy and friends (Fishie stick and the Chips), you have Embla! Your final party member! Who's a spellcaster. My first real one at this point and she's...not great. But give her a bow and hopefully you have enough poor arrows to make her not too worthless.

Anyway, she tells you that you have to sail to another island to find the Black Priory. This is the first mention of the place...I think. She says it's super important, but she does this coy thing where she says "Oh, daydreamer, you always come for me...you always do this" and the game explicitly makes comments like "It sounds like what she's saying is rehearsed, like she's done this a hundred times".

So you're in a loop for sure...which...

Look. I'm going to get in to this a bit more in The Ending but...this sucks, for sure. Why? there's no ambiguity. it's just laid out in front of you with no build up or mystery. I'll save my whining for later. But anyway, you gotta go to the Black Priory. Why? There's a god or something underneath and the big bad demon guy you see when you die wants to boof it and that's probably bad. Embla acts...cagey and acts like she can't speak of any of this around anyone because...they'll...tell the big bad guy? I honestly don't know why.

But when you get on the Ship (Iago is the captain of the ship in the cave, once you recruit Embla, Iago is no longer a playable companion and he just takes you places...by the way...) she spills most of the beans anyway so...why pretend like you can't just...tell me now? Why wait five whole minutes to explain the plot? It's pointless and makes Embla seem untrustworthy for no real benefit.

Which leads us to the last 20% of the game:

Act 3 - The Black Priory (and some side content)

This is going to be short, because this is basically the ending. There are some side quests and optional content you can do: there's a lighthouse with a guy who's cloned himself. If you help him un-summon some demons he'll sell you overpriced magical items that you don't need and there's a town of Firbold(I think?) that's...kind of lame.

Look, you get in to town and it's idyllic and happy and there's a festival and everyone's going to eat and everyone's gonna get laid. It's of course a set up for tragedy and it's actually very unlike Skald to present such an obvious farce like this. Basically, there's a festival, the townspeople say "oh man the festival is great we do one every year we all get fat and boof each other! whoopie!" and you're asked by the Baroness to help.

You do all the tasks, including killing some demon mole things which...never make another appearance for some reason nor do you bring up the demons so..whatever. But it all culminates in a play. The festival begins, you drink, you eat, everyone's having a good time. The baroness sends all the kids in to the castle to ~~die horribly~~ do a scavenger hunt. You take your seats and the play begins. It's actually a great scene, the end is that this...black hole face man appears and says "MY FACE ISN'T A MASK" which makes everyone tear their own faces off to unsee the creature. You are mildly effected. This bit I actually really like. You know this is gonna be bad, but the way it's portrayed actually caught me off guard, I liked it!

You fight some jesters(???what???) and you go inside to beat up the Baroness and her cronies and that's it. The kids are saved but you never actually fight the demon guy. Leaving, you "hear the flutter of a cape" but...that's it. Then you leave.

What makes this part suck, is that when you arrive, the characters are all talking about how nice it is to get a break and even during the festival, there's some good dialog happening. But after the demon who makes you tear our your own eyes, killing ALL the townspeople in attendance there's...no dialog. the kids are fine, you can't interact with them, you just kinda...leave the town. No words are exchanged. You don't get to fight that demon it just...leaves. What was the plan? Like the Baroness took the kids because she wants a kid of her own. She's unable to have one, so she summons demons about it. But...why do I not get to beat up that demon? He just shows up, kills everyone and...leaves...

I'm not holding out on you. Once you kill the Baroness and her minions...that's it. The kids are meandering around, you can't interact with them, nor does anyone have anything to say about what happened. You just leave. This particular town feels like it isn't finished. I don't get it. You can see the twist from a mile away, for sure. Like I said before, it feels out of place for Skald because...Skald knows better than to do this...I didn't like it.

Whatever, you get to the Mining Town of whatever the fuck and you have to go through some caves to find some stairs that the mining crews unearthed. There's a whole section here but...it's not that interesting. The highlight is that you have to set up a trap to kill some sort of eldritch brood mother. See; apparently, the brood mother is like, breeding with humans to make, like, human fish hybrids. You aren't told this until after the fact. The assumption is that, because they're fish people, they're not so good at...not being in the ocean. The idea being "hey, let's just...make guys who can climb to the top of the mountain to reach the Black Priory." But the survivors of the mining town say that they unearthed some kind of staircase, they told their company and the company sent an expedition to scout it out.

So here's a little bit of backstory. Embla tells you that there's a group of people who have made this secret society and they...know? about the god under the Priory. Who are these people? Rich people...that's basically it. Imagine that Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk and the rest of the billionaires knew where the body of Jesus Christ was and are secretly trying to unearth it so they can eat his bones in order to get a boner for the first time in years. So the Expedition that this society sent is the reason everything has gone to hell. They went up to the Priory and started digging around. Eventually finding the "Tomb" of the god and unseal it, which caught notice of the 7 eyed demon, who's now trying to boof it. The fungus creatures are caused by the Demon god so that's not good.

Anyway, you gotta get past the Brood Mother guarding the way up. But the brood mother isn't a boss fight. If you approach and try to attack, you're killed instantly. Again, what the fuck? Let me try. Make it hard but let me do what I want to do.

So the whole bit is you set up a trap. There's notes that tell you about a loose support that if broken, will collapse the cave. You set up a rope trap, you approach the brood mother as if you're going to fight her, but then run, leading her to the trap, crushing her and collapsing the cave. Except you don't, you can go back in to the cave, to then move past her, to then go up the stairs to the top of the Mountain and enter the Black Priory.

As an aside; this is the "final boss" of the fish creatures...and it's disappointing. This mega huge creature is just for show, you don't actually fight it, you just...smoosh it...so...yeah, moving on.

The Priory itself is actually nice. I do like how it looks, the design and how it looks like an expedition came through here. The Priory isn't fleshed out. There's a stupid and honestly pointless statue puzzle, but you quickly make your way down in to the tombs proper where you solve yet more puzzles that the game just gives you the answers to.

The first is the aforementioned statue puzzle. There's basically two hints. The first one is kind of vague and honestly should have been the only hint. Which says something along the lines of "To enter the tomb, you have to embrace the cycle of the day" or something. The next hint says "Arrange the statues to point in a clockwise fashion towards each other." and...yeah, that's how you get past that puzzle.

Another puzzle is one where you go in to a completely pitch black area which I thought was SUPER sick. You'd have to make your own map or basically map the place out and hope you can find your way- no there's a guy with a note who gives you exact directions...so... There's also like, a map of the darkness on the floor which...again, should have been the only hint. The map on the floor is hinted at because you find pens and paper and inspecting them says "You see that someone was copying the map on the floor, but was hastily stopped by...something". Awesome, good, let ME copy that map and maybe I'll put 2 and 2 together. If I get stuck maybe THEN offer me the hints that solve the puzzles for me. I found the solution BEFORE the actual puzzle so...whatever, moving on.

Finally, there's the gong puzzle which isn't a puzzle. You run around the crypt, finding the three dead guys and you ring the gong and say their names in order of them being alive. You do that, and the secret door is revealed, this is the door that leads to the dark place but look, I'm getting a bit frustrated with the game at this point. Why? Because I keep getting in to annoying, slow, unskippable and unavoidable fights. They just happen. You're moving around and the game stops to say "it feels like someone is trying to SELL ME SOMETHING" and then suddenly: eyeballs. Or chameleon monsters, or whatever appears out of nowhere, drains my resources and then dies.

But look, this is basically it. Once you get through the darkness, you're at -

The Ending

Okay look, here's the big spoilers. This is your last chance to go to the Conclusion to see if you should play it yourself... okay? No going back...

...

Alright, so to everyone who played the game, and to everyone who didn't.

I do not like the ending.

I've spent a few days mulling about it and the only real conclusion I can come to is that the ending feels...rushed and railroady. Like, the entire game is about your choices with these sea creatures that are coming up to land to be nasty and junk and then suddenly...that's it. The rug is pulled, the ride has stopped. Depart now.

So, here's a lightning fast recap of the ending.

You get to the tomb of the old god and The "Final Boss" is a fungus sea sponge thing...

Not the demon with 7 eyes, not even a demon it's just...big f(ch)ungus. You've been fighting fungus creatures this whole time. so why not just...bigger fungus...

So it summons some minions and you fight it. I surround the fungal tube, cast Thunderclap to perma-stun the minions (The final boss is immune to stun, lol okay) and wreck it. It's literally surrounded by my guys and dies rapidly. I think...three rounds? One of my characters gets injured but...nothing some healing spells can't fix.

Anyway we kill the giant fungus sponge easily without major incident. But Roland dies. In a cutscene, he's got rash on his tummy which has teeth. Apparently in that combat where Roland took no damage, he got HPV off screen. Maybe when I sneezed it happened.

Roland's death, like the rest of your comrades (coming up!), feels bad. It feels "Unearned". I didn't "lose". Roland dies for the sake of the plot, no actual reason just "This is the part where rocks fall and everyone dies". This is the rug pull.

The Cutscene would be touching and actually memorable if it weren't so shit. Roland grabs the back of your neck and pulls you in to him (uwu), you touch (fore)heads and through this gesture of bro-ness, you know what you have to do. Roland holds off the creature that we can easily just kill again but dies. Letting us go in to the portal to the Tomb of the god.

Why wouldn't Roland just go in to the Portal? Like yeah we know he'd die anyway but...he doesn't know that. He's got a bad case of dry toothy skin but he's about to literally wake up God. You don't think that he'd give you some cream to clear that up?

Whatever.

Stepping through the portal, you wake up naked in a spaceship or whatever the hell, I thought I would have to go rescue my party or something. But when I first found Iben laying on a medical bed, literally split in to pieces, I assumed it was a nightmare the character was having. But no, moving on the Kat who says some nonsense about wee men and then she's...eaten by wall people? And then Drinaa who's eyes have been gouged out is just praying and says nothing of note. Each one felt like a kick in the balls. Like, why? Why do any of this?

Like...too be fair, none of them were amazingly fleshed out. But this isn't earned nor is this dramatic or scary or impactful, it's fukkin stupid. It's a slide show of "And here's how Kat dies, and here's how Iben dies, and-". I get it, it's eldritch horror, everyone dies; It's part of the central theme. But there's no rhyme or reason to it. There's no point, there's no impact. It's a powerpoint presentation of my characters dying.

You could just open the dialog box to say "On your way here you passed by a Ethereal Popeyes Chicken and everyone decided to get lunch but you and Embla weren't hungry so you carried on" and it would have the same emotional weight.

It sucks.

Whatever-Embla climbs in to the Swedish Suicide phone booth and you install Windows Vista in to her brain stem, killing her instantly and finally unlocking the bootloader on Mecha Jesus or whatever the hell...that's it.

Now; you aren't allowed to not do this, there's no option to tell Embla to stuff it, and that "this place sucks and this god looks stupid. He's got ugly feet". Embla says "noooo noooo you do this every tiiime it's the right thing to doooo". You don't get a choice. So the god wakes up and you explode. The end.

Wrapping it all together just feels...hollow. The ending of "Rocks fall, everyone dies" just fell flat. like a pizza landing topping side down on a fresh concrete pour. A wet slap and disappointment all around. Because it's a loop, it'll happen again, you have no choice, but what that does is take all of your choices and the entire story and just wad it up and say "none of that mattered". Also: the fact that it's a loop without any ambiguity.

The game screams "YOU'RE IN A LOOP, THIS IS A LOOP...maybe ;3" and pretends to be coy about it-no. You don't get to pretend that there's any sort of deeper lore or debate to be had, it's clear as day and that's boring.

Having the main character wake up from "A Bad Dream" would have probably landed better. I can see it now, you wake up, relieved saying "Wow, what a dream!" and a little fish monster peeks in to your window and the words "OR WAS IT!?!" jump on screen: BAM - Roll credits.

The ending left a bad taste in my mouth. I made the entire experience...worse. I really don't know how to describe it. It felt like there was supposed to be a New Game+ around the corner. Like, you finish the game, the Volcano explodes, you get to make a new character but this time you're aware of what's happening so you move to actually GO FIGHT THE GOD DAMN 7 EYED DRAGON THING and not it's fukkin foot fungus. But that's not how it ends. It just anti climatically ends with a Volcano eruption. i get it, I really do. Eldric/Cosmic horror doesn't have big boss fights because the entity you're dealing with is so beyond your capabilities you literally can't perceive or be aware of it's existence without going mad...but there's got to be a better answer.

Having your characters arrive to the god's chamber to then just be wiped out just from it leaning over to let out a fart after sleeping for thousands of years would have been infinitely more impactful.

Imagine: Everyone is nervous, the titan begins to move and shift. Maybe a few of the characters fall to their knees in respect. I can see Driina, praising the god and asking for it's blessing, before the god awakes, and without even perceiving his rescuers, obliterates them. The flash of realization on the faces of your companions as they realize, in an instant, that they are being destroyed and then-nothing...

Would that be a better ending? I don't know, maybe...I think I'm just upset.

DOES this creature you've awoken defeat the big bad boofer? WHY does the Big Bad boofer want this god thing destroyed? What HAPPENS if it's destroyed? Doesn't matter. You woke up dad, so the game is over.

The killing of the companions may be the worst bit. Because it takes these characters that maybe you care about, and parades their corpses in front of you without any real dramatic conclusions because it doesn't matter. So showing me them being maimed and dying horribly Doesn't matter, it doesn't advance the plot, it just upsets me. the Volcano exploding was kind of the wet fart that really seals the whole deal.

There were SO many opportunities to do cool things with your companions, and you did none of them. Here are some random ideas I'm literally making up right now

Have them wander time and space, trying to find their way home
They find themselves in a different part of the ship thing, they help you navigate the maze before you must part ways. They return to their lives, wishing you the best of luck.
They just..vanish, no trace. No clue what happens to them. Gives you ALL the ability in the world to make spin offs based on them.

Again to drive the point: one of the core themes of Eldrict/Cosmic horror is that everyone dies and nobody is important enough to get a climatic ending. You die because that's what happens. It's not important, the world doesn't change, the insignificance of life is the core pillar that makes these sort of stories so compelling. It explores our human need to feel significant. These stories put an entity in front of you that can't even acknowledge your existence because you're so far beneath it. Like a person being aware of the bacteria's DNA on the pavement you're stepping on while getting in to a fist fight in the 7-11 Parking Lot because you got the last Teri-Musubi...completely unimportant and beyond your consideration or acknowledgement in that moment.

But throughout the entire game you're pushed as heroes and being central to the plot. You, compared to the entire rest of the cast and world are basically super heroes. You could argue the Fish Brood Mother fight was an attempt to temper that but...I've killed uglier. You're the only ones who can do this, literally, the game says as much. You aren't a group of randos, you're central to the plot and the universe; act like it.

As a side note for companions, I find it very funny that they all just decide "Yeah we'll follow along and fight cosmic horrors that drive us insane just from looking at them sure why not".

Really breaking it down:

Kat, your first companion, is just being nice when she helps you out. She has no reason to stick with you. She's like...owned or at least owes a Debt to the Merchant's guild. However you find the Ship Seal or something that's worth a lot of money...wouldn't her ending be "And I gave her the seal so she could buy her freedom"?

Roland your second (Technically first but whatever) was paid. All of his men are dead, sure. But he says "Hey, I was paid to do this job...so let's do the job." which...I mean too be fair, the job was to find the girl. You did, at that point he could have said "Listen, this is nuts, I'm going home or I'm making a new one here"

Driina is the only one I can see having a reason to delve so deep. Basically this is her religion and she's duty or order bound to follow through...so sure.

I think...Iben is the next one. He's also just...asked to go along with you. Why does he continue to work with you? His job was done when you took back the city of Horryn so...why?

Iago I think is the only character who actually leaves to live his life in a way that makes sense.

They don't talk to you that much, they (usually) don't give you a reason for going through untold horrors...so why are they here? So they can be killed in the end scene for a drama?

The entire ending felt like...it was the first thing written, and it was a rigid ending. It Was going to end like this, no matter what. But then they build a game with choices and options that (Sometimes) mattered and just...forgot until it was too late. The railroad has been set and you'e going on the tracks whether you like it or not.

All in all; the ending is bad and it should feel bad.

Wrap it up

So...Where do I put Skald?

Skald retails for 15 bucks, but I see it on sale regularly for about 10. It's not too long, I beat it in 17 hours, How Long to Beat puts a Main Story completion time of 17 hours so...

I recommend Skald on Sale.

Conclusion: Good game, bad ending. Finishing the game is a mark of honor on to itself. Definitely not one of my favorites, but if you like this style of game, I'd recommend it. I will however, say to not buy the "Reinforcement Pack" because...it's stupid and shame on High North Studios/Raw Fury for adding it.

Basically, the pack is like, more in game portraits, a new dice animation I think, some extra backgrounds which are...whatever, walllpapers and a merchant who sells unique magical items that you won't be able to afford nor does he matter 40% in to the game. They want 5 bucks for something that should just be in the base game and something that, if it were missing, I'd never notice. Because of the Reinforcement Pack, I'd recommend the game on Sale. But even at the full 15 dollar price tag. It's a decent enough adventure for people who like Old School Ultima style games or are in to Eldritch or Cosmic horror themes.

I like what the game is trying to do and while the ending made me...upset. It's definitely worth a sub 20 hour romp at 10-15 bucks. The rest of the story, the characters, the IMMENSE doom that's portrayed is just...excellent. Screenshots and ramblings do not do that part of the game justice.

Also I kept all the stupid unique items thinking they would be used or given to someone and it didn't matter at all which...whatever. So yeah sell the ancient slabs of Eldritch evil to a guy hawking fake paintings...sure...whatever.

Anyway, that's my review of Skald. Sorry for the long, rambly kind of post. I decided to write this as a less structured, more "line of thought" sort of review. Not as structured as my other reviews. What do you think? Do you prefer this style of writing? Send me an email and let me know.

Thanks to MobyGames for some of the screenshots and to readers like you, who use your eyes, to read.

Anyway, this is Dad and It's time for bed.